why we are descended from beetles

Did you know that all animals are descended from the same ancestor? It's true! We know this because we all have toenails. Think about it. Beetles have outerparts that are made out of toenails. Horses have feet made out of toenails. Cats have claws made out of toenails, and even I, a lowly human, have toenails...on my toes. And to think that some idiots think we all came from a monkey ancestor. Obviously, we all came from an ancestral toenail. A large, yellowing chitonous piece of tissue that was ever growing and ever needed trimming, which it accomplished by scraping its lower parts along the rocky floor of the earth. Science has also determined that it probably also had an iffy smell exuding from its underparts, which served to attract toenails of the less yellowing and thick variety so as to propogate the species.

Genius. Pure genius. We are ever indebted to the toenail. And the beetle.

All power to the beetle.

You Are a Chocolate Chip Cookie

Traditional and conservative, most people find you comforting. You're friendly and easy to get to know. This makes you very popular - without even trying!

What Kind of Cookie Are You?

I never really thought of myself as traditional and conservative, but if it gives me free license to eat muchos cookies, to heck with it. Skirts, long hair, and Bush it is! (sorry Monst. R, you've been replaced)

too late

I think I finally hit high school...about 6 years after the fact. Is it weird that I suddenly have this strong desire to get my nose pierced? Not sure if it's a good idea though - I have my ears pierced and they always get infected even with "special" earings. Also not sure if the church would approve...which ordinarily wouldn't bother me except that they give me my paycheck...

a little heretical

I'm pleased to introduce you to Monst R. Cookie, the bane of my existence. Although I have to admit the vitamin quantity in M&Ms just may surprise you, the truth is that the M&M company has it out for me. They want my sole business. No carrots allowed. What would I do without Monst R. Cookie? I would probably pine away, wasting every day in agony for want of my addictive lover. The M&M company has special access to my brain via the waves that exude from my cookie-fed mind, and thus realizes that without Monst R. Cookie, I am nothing.

If I eat with the tongues of men and angels, but have not Monst R. Cookie, it is only an empty crunch or a painful mouthful. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains of cookies, but have not Monst R., I am nothing. If I give all the cookies I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the heat of the oven, but have not Monst R., I gain nothing.

Monst R. is patient, and kind. He does not envy when I turn to other cookies, he does not boast of his delightful taste, and he is not proud. He is not rude, he is not self-seeking (after all, he does prefer to be destroyed by my hungry, cavernous mouth), he is not easily angered, he keeps no record of wrongs. My Monst R. Cookie does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. He always protects the sweetness, always trusts that I'll be hungry, always hopes that the oven is on, and always perseveres (especially when I'm on a diet).

And now these three remain: cake, tarts, and Monst R. Cookie. But the greatest of these is my Monst R.

in answer to your question...

I actually never realized there WAS a difference until I went to the conference!

When you sponsor a child through Compassion, the money goes toward directly benefitting your child - it goes toward funding the child development centre that each sponsored child attends every day after school. Each centre is run by a local church. There they get tutoring, training in skills (like sewing, carpentry...), medical attention, food (if they need it), spiritual training, and above all, a safe place to be! In some other child sponsorship programs (like World Vision), most of your money goes toward community development projects like drilling wells and building schools. That definitely can have a positive impact on the kids, but there's no guarantee that that project will benefit your sponsor child! So it's a great program, but "child sponsorship" is a bit of a misnomer. And just in case you're wondering, Compassion does have community development programs too, they just come out of another fund. Basically, "Compassion's focus is children, so we use child sponsorship funds directly for the growth and development of children and guarantee that every child will hear the Gospel." (I ripped that off the website :) Does that answer your question?

We have sponsor kids through both programs, so I'm not against World Vision, I just think that more of my "child sponsorship" dollars are making it to my child through Compassion.

oh, one more thing. Compassion focuses more on the Christian sector as sponsors because they want each sponsor to be a missionary to their child - to pray for the kid, write letters, and encourage. World Vision has a broader focus, which is cool too because it accomplishes other purposes. I'm just biased :)

compassion

The more I learn about Compassion Canada, the more I love the organization! If you've ever been thinking about sponsoring a child, Compassion Canada is definitely better than World Vision (oops, did I just write that out loud?). In my humble opinion. I was at a Compassion conference this weekend and learned...everything! So go ahead...ask me a question...I dare you...

boo. Did you know that Elvis really IS dead? Boy, that shatters a lot of dreams. I guess I'll have to move in at heartbreak hotel.

sheesh

Sheesh, when did time start going so fast?
Good grief, now I sound like a 65 year old grandmother..."time flies dear, and it goes faster the older you get." I believe it though. I've spent the last week being inundated with information about the church, the job, the kids, the volunteers...last night I was sure I was going to explode. That would have been lovely. But instead, I now feel "centered" again, and I need some help! So to anyone who's reading this, what would be a good, original topic for a short devotional on grace? Any genius ideas are welcome...non-genius ideas need not apply...just kidding. ;)
I'll take anything. I already did one on Samson, which was about as random as I could think of.




...just a random photo. although if someone can come up with a connection between it and grace, i'd be eternally obliged!

BLUE

It really is mostly blue - there are just patches that show up better...














see? I did it!

THE TALE OF THE OAK - a short story by Christie

Once upon a time there was a block of wood. The wood's name was Oak. Now Oak was a very beautiful piece of wood, so a girl decided that it would make a very nice pen. So...she chopped it in half with a really noisy saw. It make Oak cry to feel his tendons hacked in two, but what could he do?








Poor Oak felt really cut down to size after that process...and then came the drill. Then he felt as though his heart was being pushed right out of his body. And then, to make matters much worse, the girl laughed at him and used him as a joke. Poor Oak.









But then came the part that Oak hadn't anticipated. He was cruelly put upon a lathe and...whittled? He was chipped and chopped, but slowly he noticed his rough edges coming off. His corners were smooth. He still had bumps and bruises, because, after all, he was Oak. But they were becoming less significant...almost beautiful. But no, what good could come out of this process? It hurt too much.











And then came the part that shocked Oak the most. Whereas before, he had been an ordinary piece of wood in a box, now people were oohing and ahhing at him. They said his curves were magnificent, that his grain was lovely, and that his skin was so smooth. What had happened?










The girl had taken Oak and turned him into something beautiful. Something useful. It had hurt in many ways, but now he was something special.




Hooray for Oak.

psalm 93

The darkness shakes in anticipation. Forbidding waters churn, delighting in the chaos they create. Frothy, expectant peaks rise up out of the shadows. At their base, the smooth, yawning mouth of floodwaters opens up to receive its greatest prize. Life.

Death awaits.

But there is another. It stalks the midnight waters, riding a chariot that blazes with the promise of life. It stalls chaos in its stead. Pallid peaks cower in terror. The cavernous mouth is forced shut. It unleashes its power over the seas. Mightier than the roar of the great waters, Its thundering voice orders the deep into submission. There is no option.

Life prevails.

It is GOD.

a word from the un-wise

If your doctor tells you to lay on your back all day, don't do it in the sun on the hottest day of spring.
Take note.
Learn from my mistakes.

*ouch*

you know you're a redneck when...

you're of the younger female variety and you drive a massive truck...and you fit right in!

a story?

I was hungry. I had thrown my bus money in my pocket in the morning, but forgotten my purse at home. I guess it knew what kind of day I was going to have and didn't want to participate. It was only after I got off the bus that I realized I had no money, no phone, and no food. What was I to do? I sat down on a concrete bench and mulled over my predicament. I felt like I had rocks jostling in my stomach, and my tongue was thick with thirst. Maybe...maybe...if I asked someone for some money, they would take pity on me. So I asked. Unfortunately, I had put on my grungy clothes today. I asked a proffesor-ly looking woman for a couple bucks. Her eyes flickered over me, but she didn't miss a step in her hurry to get to a more important person than me. I asked a university student. He turned out his pockets halfway, shook his head and shrugged in apology. A little later on, I saw him come out of Macs with a slurpee in hand. With my sense of humanity slowly dying inside me, I asked an old woman, a teenager, and another university student, all to no avail. They either gave me a querying look and kept walking, or just turned the other way. By now I was running on an empty tank. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. Can people really be that calloused toward another human being? Are our lives really that important that we can't stop to give a hungry person 2 bucks for a sandwich or a bus ride home? Finally, in the midst of the endless mess of people walking by me without a glance, I spotted an elderly man with a walker. He looked like he might at least be walking slow enough that he couldn't politely ignore me if I asked him for a couple bucks. I asked. He shuffled my way. He stopped and looked at me in the eyes, and introduced himself as Albert. He shook my hand and offered to take me to Subway.

My humanity was restored by the touch of a wrinkled hand and a kind gesture from someone who probably received less kindness and patience on a regular basis than me.

So tell me, why is it that we feel justified in walking right by people who ask for help? Why is it that it took a little old man on welfare to buy me a simple lunch?

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. - Jesus Christ


















Always be clothed in white, and always anoint your head with oil. - King Solomon

















He restores my soul.














God is bigger than the boogieman. - Jr. Asparagus
(He's also bigger than a buffalo...)